I Cherish My Husband

About a week ago, I had a bad dream. A really bad one. It was so bad that I woke up crying uncontrollably. I think that might have been a first for me.

I dreamed Aaron died, and I was a witness. In my dream, we were on our way to a family reunion with Aaron's side of the family. We packed so much stuff, that we had to rent a U-haul truck, as well as a trailer.

Aaron was driving the U-haul truck with the trailer hitched on it's back, and I was  following him in our van with all of the kids.  We were driving up through CA, and the roads were crazy, busy!

While following him, I saw him trying to weave in and out of traffic, and then all of a sudden things got bad! I saw his trailer swerve while he was trying to miss cars, and then it completely turned over. That was the beginning of the pile-up, and I knew Aaron was in the middle of it.

When I got to the hospital, all of Aaron's family was there, and they were so very nice and supportive. They had some how made it to the hospital before me, so they already knew what Aaron's condition was. When I asked them how Aaron was doing, all they said was, "it was a bad accident."

I knew at that moment, what they meant, and I broke down.

Later in my dream, I was with a few of his family members at the scene of the crash. It all became very real to me then, and I felt in my heart, just how much I really loved Aaron, and how much I would miss him.

I was completely heartbroken!

I then realized that because I hadn't yet finished school,  I would have no way to provide for my seven children. I did think about our life insurance, and how I would have to use it to support us while I went back to school.  This gave me some peace, but I contemplated how our lives were going to change, and knew the road ahead wouldn't easy.

I started to panic because I didn't know how I was going to proceed forward. I had never planned a funeral, and I felt lost.

The only hope I had, was to call on my home teachers and visiting teachers for help. I knew they'd be there for me, and would know what to do, but I couldn't find their numbers and it was even harder to find them because I was so far from home.

It was at that point, that I woke up crying. More like sobbing! It took me a good 15 minutes to calm down.

I've thought a lot about that dream the past few weeks, and I believe I've learned some valuable lessons:

1. Always carry your home teacher's/visiting teacher's numbers on you.
2. Know who to contact when your spouse dies, and have those numbers saved on your computer.
3. Mosiah 18:9-9 has really made a huge impression on me after this dream.  I can now see, even more than in times past, why it's so important to be there for others, especially in their times of need. 
4. And lastly, that I should cherish each and everyday that I have with Aaron.  I have tried to really pamper, and freely show him my affection.  When he comes home from work, I make him my #1 priority!  I tell him that I love him, and how great he looks today.  I make time to fulfill his needs and have found that we've been so much closer!  It almost feels like the old days, but better! 

So I would encourage any of you that may feel worn out and tired, to try to give a little more to your spouse!  It's so worth it!  It really makes a difference.  :)